If you’re here, you’re probably wondering, “What do I look for in a guy?” 

Dating is hard, don’t get me wrong, but no matter your age, there are still good guys out there. I’m going to show you what dating green flags you should look for in your search for a long-term partner. 

We discuss dating red flags a lot around here. In some ways, those are easier to spot. If you’re paying attention, you can tell when something’s wrong. You feel it in your gut.

Green flags in relationships can be harder to spot than red flags

If you have battle scars in your dating journey, you can start to believe that you’ll never meet a nice guy-and then when one comes along you don’t allow yourself to get to know him because he must be too good to be true.   This is especially true if you’ve never really found dating success and have had your hopes dashed more than once.  You might wonder, “Is this even what a healthy relationship looks like? I have no idea?!”

Let’s talk through some green flags in relationships to look out for.

1. He has nothing to hide

Honesty is everything in relationships (and in life in general), and your “green flag” man will know that and live by it.

Have you ever dated a guy who didn’t open up very much about his personal life or past relationships? That’s a red flag.

An even bigger red flag might be a guy speaking disrespectfully about his ex. This might be a  pattern you notice in a guy who is emotionally immature.  You might notice that he blames others for his problems and interestingly, nothing ever seems to be his fault!

Behold, your future! In a few months, he’ll probably be on a date with another girl bad mouthing YOU. Ah, you have become one of the crazy ex girlfriends.  Welcome!

A green flag, however, might be him opening up about his important past relationships in a respectful way and owning up to his past mistakes. He sees his part in the demise of a relationship and doesn’t demonize his ex. Now that is a guy worth getting to know!

Q: What do I look for in a guy? A: He keeps his word

Honesty can also look like our green flag man showing up when he says he will and doing the things he promises he will. These things might seem like a no brainer, but being able to count on and depend on someone is huge. Don’t discount these seemingly small demonstrations of respect and care. They are awesome green flags in dating to look out for.

2. He respects boundaries

We all need boundaries in life. If you don’t have any, I encourage you to get some.  How much time are you willing to spend on dating? When you meet a guy, how long do you want to text and chat on the phone before meeting in person? How and how often do you want to communicate? What are you comfortable  with physically and emotionally in a new relationship? Do you strive to achieve a balance between work, dating and seeing your family and friends?

These are all important questions to ask yourself and get clear about. Once you know what your own boundaries are and you’ve clearly communicated them,  your “green flag” man will respect and honor them. 

You won’t have to remind him about them. You won’t have to repeat yourself asking for the same things time and time again-he will hear you and he will care about you enough to respect you. Dating green flags: he has his own boundaries and takes care of himself

And if you find a guy who has healthy boundaries of his own, EXCELLENT~ This shows that he respects himself, he’s done work on himself and he also prioritizes taking care of himself. Just like you do. And if he’s in a healthy place, he can show up for you and your relationship in a healthy way. Pretty great, right?

3. He cheers you on

A red flag is when a guy is controlling. He doesn’t want you to take the promotion at work because it will mean you will have less time to spend with him.  

But our green flag man not only congratulates you, but brings the champagne to celebrate your accomplishments. You never have to wonder if he’s proud of you or supportive of your goals-he can’t hide how proud he is!!

Dating green flags can lead to a successful relationship

Shocker alert: he may even compliment you and, eventually, drop the L word (but not too soon-remember that too much too soon is another red flag)! 

You deserve all the green flags in the world. 

I’m always here to support you on your dating journey! As a starting point, I encourage you to download my free dating checklist to help you clearly define what you want and what you DO NOT want in a guy! 

Let’s stop wasting time dating assholes and start swiping with strategy!